Living, no, not alive!

I live a life
A life without a soul
I’m living
I breathe
Every second of my existence
A painful torture
Excruciating hell
I live, I’m living
For the world, a story to tell
I cause no ripples
I’m static
I’m here
I live with no acceptance
For the truth, and my wrath
I write senseless scribbles
To sustain my breath
I’m living, yes
Am I alive? No,no.

I tried

I tried to be happy
I tried, trust me
I smiled
I laughed aloud
I tried, I did
I thought I numbed my pain
I turned my feelings off
I acted insane
I acted like a dork
I was goofy
I was
I grinned
I joked
At my expense
At mine, mine alone
I thought it’s true, this joy
This smile I plastered
The laughs I crackled
It hurt
It hurt to smile
It hurt to laugh
I tried, still, I did
Tears tried to make a grand entry
Saying
They were my only truest mates
Without any falseness
I could cry
Cry aloud
But afraid I was
My fear
Tears were indeed my truest pals
They were original and pure
Yet I tried
To smile
For I almost mastered
The art
Didn’t I?

Love and love

If love was pure
If it was pure
And available
Without any price
Without disguise
If love could stay
If only it may
More than a fraction of perception
More than something so loose and unfair
If love was here
For you, me and all
For the broken and the lost
The healed too, at no cost
If love was there
Not being unfair
To the poor in heart
To the weak in soul
If love was true
If only it was
I don’t know what it could cause
Love and love
Dreams of a fool
Fantasies of no rule