What is it this time?
What did I do?
Wasn’t I being sweet?
Perfect and all that you wanted
I did all that I can
Gave up my true self
Faked it
So that you would stay
I tried my best
But like everytime
You left
No reason
No message
Just like that
Is it you?
Is it me?
She never came in tiptoes
She came in
Like a raging avalanche
She never asked
Only demanded heftily
She never bothered
Only did what she pleased
She didn’t show love
She said she was a narcisist
She gave no heed to insults
She had the sharpest tongue
She never cared about beauty
She felt she was other-worldly
She never laughed or cried
She either smirked from mockery
Or yelled for answers
She was never with a crowd
She gave lot of self time
She never felt alone
Because she was alone
Too much noise,so much commotion
Lots of disturbance,meaning I crave
Empty,sick,senseless words
Wicked imbeciles,foolish stupids
Purity and sense is all I demand
Lies and hypocrisy,deception and pride,crashing
Truth,modesty,find no space,no room
Trails of stink they leave,they go,they come
Scattering darkness,burning the light
Sparks I dream,brightness I search
Clashing,clashing,I try moving forward
To survive,a challenge,to live,a victory
Give it up
When you see the light is gone
Give it up
When you can’t feel the feel no more
When the meaning is gone
What’s in holding on?
When the purpose is forgotten
What’s in fighting hard?
When the breath is already spent
You don’t water a lifeless plant
Then why watering a dead cause
You don’t live a deceased life
Then why watering a departed hope
Accept it
Though grueling it maybe
Be cynical
If that’s meant to be
Saying no to something you’d kill for
Cravings you can’t control
Desire you can’t put an end to
Longing, trying too hard to resist
Yearning dying too bad to combust
Wish, wistful to be fulfilled
Aspiration strongly to be achieved
So many wants, wanting
Goals waiting
Targets raising, yet uncared
Stakes higher than ever
Yet there’s no stir, no emotion
Not a hope or answer
Not an inch of progress
Not a spur of belief
Faith is gone
Life is bleak and dark
Reason is lost
So is the purpose
What’s there to be?
What’s there to exist?
If there’s no sense in living
No chance in surviving
I try to fake it
Try to make myself believe
That it’s okay
That it’s fine, and I don’t care
But it hurts
Cuts me deep
Like I’m bleeding inside
I want to run
Somewhere I can expel
Tears build up inside
But they don’t like to roll down
They agree with me
They know I don’t like to look feeble
But I am, aren’t I?
I wish I had something to clutch
To embrace my rumpling self
But again
I look like a masochist
Who would even notice?
Scribbles and Rambles 